Author, life coach and motivational speaker Tony Gaskins is one of the most sought after individuals in the game for good measure. Boasting well over a million followers on his social media accounts combined, this Florida native is known for open and candid approach on life, love and relationships. Recently, we spoke to Gaskins exclusively about setting and sticking to New Years resolutions, staying positive, his newest book The Dream Chaser and more. Check out the interview below.
theJasmineBRAND.com: 2017 is here! Setting New Years resolutions can not only be intimidating but overwhelming. Do you believe in New Year’s resolutions? And if so, how do we set goals and follow through?
Tony Gaskins: Yes, I believe in New Year’s Resolutions! It’s always good to set goals, but more important to follow through. Start with goals in bite sizes and move up as you go. Set realistic goals to build good habits and then move into the bigger goals as the year goes on. Write the goals down on a piece of paper or in a journal. Wake up early enough each morning to sit with your goals at least 5 minutes. Read your goals and run you finger across them as you read them. Let them sink in and then start your day.
For those of us who want a better, more fulfilling life. Where do we start?
To have a better life you first have to change your belief system. You have to change the reasoning behind why you do what you do. You have to identify with why you want to change your life. Your actions won’t mean a lot if the reasoning behind the actions aren’t in place. Identify with your motives. Then literally believe in yourself. Then set goals. Then make a plan. Then take action. Repeat daily. Your life will change because you will be in the drivers seats instead of in the backseat.
We follow you on social media and love how encouraging you are. How can we stay positive during personal slumps?
You have to change the way you see slumps. I have slumps too but I realize the slump is for me to get a lesson before my blessing. I realize that the slump is to test my commitment. You have to embrace the slumps and do work in spite of your feelings. Do what you know you should do, not what you feel like doing. Ignore your feelings and obey your conscience.
For single people who are seeking relationships, how or where should we be looking for love?
You should be looking in the mirror to discover the things you can work on. Do you need to start your business? Do you need to take your business to the next level? Do you need to lose 5lbs? Do you need to gain 5lbs? Do you need to eat better, read more, or set bigger goals? When you work on yourself relentlessly love will find you.
What’s one of the biggest mistakes people make in relationships?
One of the biggest mistakes people make is trying to be in a relationship, but refusing to learn how to relate. Love is a job you can’t retire from. You have to become skilled at relationships just like you have to become skilled on your job. You have to find mentors in love just like you find mentors for business. You have to learn how to love yourself. Learn how to love your partner. Learn what a healthy relationship looks like. Learn what real love looks and feels like.
Once you have the knowledge of what truly is then you can set better standards and be a better love. Read my books Real Love, Mrs. Right, Single Is Not A Curse, and The New Guy Code. Then move on to other resources and courses and never stop growing in love.
Tell us about your book, The Dream Chaser.
The Dream Chaser is a book filled with lessons on identifying your gifts and building your dreams. I share my story of how I went from working for someone else to owning several of my own companies with several streams of income. It’s an inspirational and motivational book that teaches through storytelling and real life examples.
What lesson in life took you the longest to learn?
I’m still learning those lessons. I’m learning how to break generational curses. I’m learning how to break the curse of being “broke-minded” and trying to buy self-worth through the acquisition of things. I’m learning how to eat better, sleep better, and truly love myself in every area of life. When we stop learning, we’re no longer alive. Although I’ve achieved some things, I’m still learning every day and teaching along the way.
What’s one tip that we should be doing daily to make 2017 the best year yet!
Create a daily routine and keep it. Make it a habit and do it no matter what. It could be to pray, meditate, or read a chapter of your bible every morning. It could be to pray and then recite your goals. It could be to work out at least 15 minutes every morning. Write down a manageable and realistic routine that you can maintain daily and it will change your life. It’s against the Universal Law to do work and not get a result. If you work, you will see a change.