DJ Envy & Gia Casey On Overcoming Cheating
Everyone that is married or has been married can honestly say, marriage is a lot of work. Especially for Gia Casey and DJ Envy. Envy, who is a DJ, radio personality and business man, has been with his wife, Gia Casey, who is a mother of five, and the host of her own podcast – “The Casey Crew,” for a steady 23 years. While things have not always been the best, during a new installment of ESSENCE Live, Casey and Envy get candid how they kept their marriage fresh, overcoming cheating, and which couple they think should stay together. Peep the excerpts below.
On their sex life:
Envy: I mean, we have five kids. And I think for us, we just try to keep it spicy. We try to do things outlandish. And not to sound crazy, but she’s my everything. She’s my wife, she’ll turn into my slut. Everything we want to do in bed, we do. I’ve been a cowboy. I’ve been Barack Obama. I’ve been a police officer. And one time, I was Maxwell.
On communication and honesty in a “boring” marriage:
Casey: You wouldn’t use those words, though. You see what I mean? Instead of going into your adjective box. You would make suggestions on things you would like to do, you would like to see her in, places you’d like to do, things you’d like to try. ‘Hey, let’s watch a porno together.’ You make it fun and exciting.
Because when you say boring. Now, she’s working off an insecurity. ‘Wow. Maybe I’m lame. I wonder what other girls are doing.’ And now, when you start working with someone who is insecure, that’s a whole other beast. Cause now, you have a whole bunch of other problems that you’re introducing to the situation. You have to handle your partner with kid-gloves and take care of not just them, but their emotions.
On how the pair overcame infidelity within their marriage:
Envy: God. Absolutely. I think our faith has everything to do with it.
Casey: Everything. A 100%.
Envy: You know, I’m not going to say I wasn’t into church and God before, but when that incident happened, it just opened our eyes as a family; not just me and my wife. To the point where, we pray every morning before I go to work. Everything in our family is based on our faith now.
On how Tyrese played a part in preparing Casey and Envy’s marriage:
Envy: Not only did Tyrese give me good advice. Tyrese heard me on the radio and heard of the pain that I was going through at that time. And I didn’t know him, and he called. He became kind of like, our counselor and he would call my wife and he would come. Tyrese was so genuine. He was making me a better man.
On how social media played a major part in their marriage:
Envy: The crazy thing is, 20 years ago, I wouldn’t have had to tell our kids [a bout the infidelity] because they would have never found out. But we had to tell our kids, ahead of time. What was the first thing our kids said?
Casey: When we told them what? Oh!
Envy: They said, ‘Dad, how did you get caught?!
On how Envy got caught cheating:
Envy: Social media and a bluff. She bluffed and said she knew something that I thought she knew so I wound up telling on myself.
Casey: I’m a good bluffer.
Envy: But actually, and I hate to say it, but it has made our relationship stronger. We’re closer. It’s like we’re on another level.
Casey: It’s crazy, because before I found out, there were no red flags. He was, very good. He treated me like a Queen. I had everything that I wanted. He was affectionate, sweet, complimentary, he did everything he was supposed to do. And then, a little bit of common sense kicked in, and I was like a dog with a bone.
But since I found out, and God became a part of our relationship and our marriage, and we put him in first – everything followed behind that. Just like he said, I could have never imagined being as happy as I am now. And I thought I was happy before! I couldn’t imagine that connection between someone else.
On trustworthiness in their relationship:
Envy: See, the thing with our relationship is: yesterday I was sleeping, and I put something on Instagram, when I wake up, Gia’s on my phone, ‘You gotta fix your grammar, baby.’
Casey: I went to edit…like!
On open marriages:
Envy: I’m too insecure for that. I could never imagine seeing another guy with my wife. Then I gotta worry about, is his thing bigger than mine? Is he laying it down better than me? No!
Casey: This all hypothetical. But I was like, what about me and another female? He was like, no! ‘I don’t want to think about you with another female. What she might be doing.
On the celebrity couple they think should stay together:
Envy: It’s between T.I. and Tiny. I love them because they been together for a long time. And LaLa and Carmelo.
Casey: T.I. and Tiny. It’s not because they’ve been together so long. I think the problems that I can see – or that I’m assuming they’re going through, what I see on social media – I think they’re relatively fixable.
On staying in a marriage for kids:
Casey: I don’t believe in staying in a marriage for children. I think primarily, the husband and the wife have to be happy together and let that love spill over into the children.
On T.I. stating his marriage was a “distraction”:
Envy: I don’t get the distraction thing. Marriage is more important than any job, any dollar sign, any check. Than anything out there. So the priority should be the marriage and maybe work is the distraction. He might need to take some time off work and focus on family.