Kevin Hart Says: I S*** On Myself On Stage + Announces Confessions From The Hart
Kevin Hart’s baring all in 2020 and it’s only March.
The comedian already confessed plenty in his Netflix docuseries Don’t F*** This Up.
Now, he’s dropping even more graphic bombs as he rolled out his next special “Confessions From The Hart” to get people through quarantine in the wake of the spread of the coronavirus. He vowed to deliver two to three stories a week before revealing his first confession.
“It’s a story from when I was in Scandanavia, and I got food poisoning. I ended up s***ting on myself on stage. I don’t know what it was man, I think we ate some raw chicken. We were somewhere and the chicken had like a little pink color to it. And my friends, the Plastic Cup Boys, was like ‘Naw, I ain’t f***ing with that chicken. That chicken don’t look like its cooked all the way.’ And I took a couple bites of it and I was like ‘Yeah, don’t… Leave the chicken alone.’ But I did take some bites of it.”
Kevin Hart said “all hell broke loose” that night.
“I’m throwing up, I can’t keep nothing down.”
He said since he was out of the country, he didn’t want to go to the hospital and decided to “rough it out.” He refused to cancel his show the next morning and said he could “soldier through it” while on stage. Still, once they pulled up at the venue, he still couldn’t keep anything down and decided to sit on the toilet until showtime.
“I drank a quick thing of water and Ginger Ale to settle my stomach before I go on stage. I go on stage, I start performing, I’m midway through, I don’t feel bad. I’m gonna make it. I get to the last seven minutes of my set. Bloop, bloop. I feel my stomach. Oh no. Don’t do this to me… Come on, Kevin, finish. I go to tell my joke…I can’t end the show because I’m in the middle of the joke, I start trying to speed through the joke. I can’t do it.”
And I’m cramped up to the point where I can’t even walk. So I’m holding this tight pose while I got the microphone and I said f*** it. I s***ted on myself. Right on stage. I got off stage and was like oh well. Went to the bathroom, threw them draws in the trash, left the venue… one of the most depressing rides to the hotel I ever had in my life.”
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