Zendaya On Growing Up & Making Her Own Decisions: I Had Too Many People I Was Trying To Please
While she’s been on the small screen and big screen since she was a teenager, Zendaya has been her own person for quite some time. She said a turning point from being seen as a character on Disney to truly growing up came when she purchased a $1.4 million mansion at 20-years-old, which marked the beginning of her making decisions for herself.
“I had grown up—I moved out, and it was time for me to be the sole voice in my career and make my own choices. I just had too many people I was trying to please, too many opinions, and I was constantly talked out of following my gut and my instinct. I don’t have a road map for this s***—I grew up really, really fast. I learned to trust myself a lot more.”
Still, Coleman, who’s now 23, confessed that she struggles with her fear of failure.
“I never want to mess up. I’m trying to be the best version of myself without overapplying pressure. Then I start spiraling.”
“I know, I’m super hard on myself.“
While she stepped into her own years ago, Coleman said she still feels good when others compliment her work.
“People actually saying I did a good job at my craft…it’s like, ‘D***, I did work hard. I’m glad you see that.’… I should finally own that; it’s liberating. I feel lucky.”
Meanwhile, she said she’s learned lots of life lessons as she plays, Rue Bennett, in HBO’s Euphoria.
“I think Euphoria taught me a lot about myself. It made me more confident in my own abilities because I doubted myself a lot. I was looking for something to prove I can do it. ‘Euphoria’ served as that, in the healthiest way. I never want to plateau as an actress—I always want to be able to explore and push myself. [Being an actress] brings me to places and makes me do things I’d probably never do because I’m such an introverted person.”
Now that the show is on break following its successful first season, Coleman said,
“Euphoria was eight months of my life, and now that it’s done I’m like, ‘F***’. You put your s*** out there, and it’s a really terrifying thing to do. It’s out for the world to see—it’s so f***ing weird.”
Are you feeling grown-up Zendaya? Tell us in the comments.